Such are the changing times we live in that the bustle of the City of London has become a haven of peace and quiet — at least according to Roger Hargreaves, UK Director of Maritime.
Opening law firm HFW's London International Shipping Week conference this week, the man from the Ministry of Transport said the event was providing him with light relief after the chaos engulfing the UK parliament in Westminster, which is gripped by Brexit fever.
"Last week, I was shouted at by a man through a traffic cone about Brexit. I saw two men fighting. This doesn't happen in the City," he told delegates.
But it wasn't all calm at the symposium.
Citi's shipping head Michael Parker confronted the audience with the shock claim that "we're the bank that likes to say no".
With his tongue fully in his cheek, the banker said: "That's it. No ships. You know they'll just end up in the hands of the lawyers anyway."
The idea of the event was to talk up London's shipping strengths.
The five-minute slots for the speakers were enforced by HFW lawyer Craig Neame ringing a bell as their allotted time expired.
Institute of Chartered Shipbrokers director Julie Lithgow's voice dripped with sarcasm as she said this was "not distracting at all. I thought it would be, but it really doesn't interrupt the flow".
All the usual bases were covered in extolling the capital's virtues — the advantages of the education system, the tax regime, the time zone and more.
But the most bizarre claim in the city’s favour came from Scottish shipowner John Denholm. Rather wryly, his list included “a great climate”.
Now, although London probably endures less rain than north of the border, TradeWinds would suggest sun-drenched California might just have the edge.
